“This is happening…”
“It’s finally over…”
“You did what?!”
As an adult (kind of sort of not really) I’ve learned that things are easy to ignore and brush off so long as you never admit to or hear someone say things out loud.
For example, a break-up can be considered a break until the fat lady (or your significant other or yourself) finally sings the truth – that’s it’s over and it’s kaput and never happening again.
Or when you hurt yourself, and you don’t start crying until someone asks you of you’re okay or what happened and you start welling up slowly and then burst out into tears and ugly Kim Kardashian cry face sobs like your life depends on it.
Or when you look at a lottery ticket, and your numbers match up with the numbers on the screen and yet you don’t jump up and down with glee until you hear the words “oh my god we won!!” from an outside source or your own physical body.
I think that’s why, as we grow older we learn how to verbalized our thoughts and feelings and emotions… Learning how to do so makes these events and emotions more real.
I never realized how freaking crazy the next couple of months are going to be for me because I had never said them out loud until this afternoon while talking to a realtor (who is kind enough to help me in my mission impossible to find a good apartment for the right price in the right location in a bustling city).
Starting in September I will be going to school full time, all my classes will be condensed into 2 days a week and the other 5 will be spent working full time at my job to ensure that I make enough to supplement the cost of school, rent, and other worldly expenses I am bound to have.
I will be preparing to move, taking care of my precious Kitty Child, and trying to stay alive myself.
I am without a doubt one of the craziest people I know and honestly it wasn’t real to me until I heard it through someone else’s ears.
Here’s to hoping I make it through relatively unscathed, and with a modicum of sanity (not that I have much to begin with).
That’s all for this Hump Day, folks. I’m off to sleeeeeeeep until the cows come home.
– The Apparent Go Getter